That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
Just got the test results back. All clean, Now whose an idiot for going bareback in South America for 3 months straight.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
I should just tell him this. He doesn't need to be all nice and ask me on dates and to do gay stuff like hangout during the day. I'll still sleep with him regardless.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
hes trying to draw the periodic table on his chest with a sharpie. i'm not sure how thats going to help him on his chem final, but he keeps shouting "this is how the pros do it"
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
New drinking game, drink every time Rhianna says "Work" in her new song.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
Randomize
