Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I'm excited for him and his new girlfriend. I'm just going to miss his penis is what I'm saying.
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
