wrigley field is MILF paradise
We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
The air was thick with penises
I'm sure we could go all project runway on our diapers and create some flattering absorbent thongs. We could do it on the Boat. Call it project rumway.
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I know you just got bad medical news... But want some moonshine?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
Randomize
