ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
Dude I got a text from you at 1:30 last night and you didn't use any vowels
Haha, I didn't want to buy any... we're in a recession you know
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
he suggested i make a website called "cum on molly's face", to "start off my acting career"
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
Why I hate online dating: not even one day in and a 57 year old asks me to call him "Daddy."
He yelled "Go Ducks" while he came
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
Randomize