yo i have your phone
... oh so you probably won't get this message
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
tonight lets celebrate not being married
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
So much to do, haven't done anything except hook up with sailors and work on my tan.
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
I dunno what's worse, the fact that I hooked up with a guy that shaves his armpits or that I didn't notice until he brought it up the next day
Passing out drunk in my therapists lobby may not be the best way to confirm my "stability"
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
I'm "drunk text both siblings" drunk.
Randomize
