Oh man dude like 1000 to 1500 milligrams. Its gonna burn like bad though.
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
He was rambling about life and dignity and happiness. but all i kept thinking was PENIS. YOU HAVE A PENIS. I CAN SHOW YOU WHERE TO PUT THAT PENIS.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
All I did was present the dick. You did the work. That's like thanking the pencil for a test you got an A on.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
I'm so high that I'm intently watching my neighbor move his car back and forth in order to put his motorcycle in the garage, and getting irritated that it seems so complicated.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
You're right. Cause really... I'm in the back of his head. Even though what I said was better than "I have herpes"... I did once say that to him. So I'm like a reoccurring nightmare.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
Randomize
