are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
At least I know she didn't hear me crawl to my room. Or did I walk on my hands? Fuck if I know.
Stripper pole. Sore legs. More vaca money.
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
We will go to karaoke
Okay, well, i'm covered in paint, haven't showered & have already been drinking, so if I fall on the floor in a blaze of depeche mode & beer tears, you can't pretend you don't know me
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
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