New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
good thing vaginas are great cup holders
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
The hot guy sitting next to me in the lib is reading a book called "Impersonal sex in public places." How wrong would it be to give him my number when I bounce?
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
Dear god my vagina.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize
