Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
So you really shouldn't go around telling people you're fireproof
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
You know those ponds where you go and pay $5 and your guarranteed to catch a fish thats how i describe her
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
He kept saying that the puke outside the theater wasn't his and it was all a set up to keep him from partying with the whores. Then he passed out on the sidewalk.
He sat there and debated the pros and cons of hooking up with me
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
tanning, a slurpee, and a cigarette. spa day college edition
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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