I'm gonna have a badass scar
she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
We can just chill or day drink or smoke or watch law and order marathon or play just dance 4 or watch a movie or go to the movies or play hide and seek or hug, so many options
I wasn't an ass in college so much more like I showed my ass a lot especially during serious beerpong games. You know I don't fuck around when it comes to sports.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
