You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
just used a paint mixing cup as a shot glass. thank u art school.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
Then she called me a home wrecking whore.
dont they live in a condo? that doesnt count.
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
I'm still waiting for my blazer that I left at your apartment, you owe me a blowjob for every day from Thursday on that it's late.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Your either lost or getting food, if your lost find me a girl on your way back, if your getting food grab me a double cheese
Brown or brunette? Ketchup or mustard?
I love you bro
The only thing you accomplished yesterday was dry humping me on the floor of my work place WHILE I was working.
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Do you think showing up at his door with bourbon and chicken is too forward?
Randomize
