Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
I thanked her for the handjob she gave me in the middle of the night. She had no idea what i was talking about. I think she sleep-jerked-me-off. Im def sleeping over tonight too
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
she got into med school, i feel dumb for banging her dance major friend
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
She makes walking on a treadmill look like a porno. I wish I could send over shots as an ice breaker.
That's effing brilliant. We should start a business.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
No, it's cool, I just bounced from the hospital. I was...talking to a security guard, maybe?
her fuck buddy was butt ass naked in our kitchen making waffles but they tasted so bomb
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize
