Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
just made one giant jello shot... if i have to study on a saturday night, i'm gonna do it as drunk as possible
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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