Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I'm going to kill the bastard that switches my hot hookups from the previous night with ugly chicks
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Forced to cancel my booty call due to the snowpocalypse. This crosses the line.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
I WANNA SUCK HIS DICK ON A BOAT
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Randomize