brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
just witnessed some guy trade his friend $5 and a condom for his keys.
You're the only person I know who would say "we'll play it by ear" referring to a threesome
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
Totally passed out on the dealers bed after paying him all in ones so no, i dont think i'll be getting a discount soon.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
When we were all out of beer you took a bite out of the cardboard beer box and said "close enough."
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
I'm sober now, I ate a whole cantaloupe.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
