Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
The guy at McDonald's just told us there is no flash photography allowed.
i just saw her new tattoo, how much more trashy can you get than having "taste the rainbow" on your body for the rest of your life?
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
You told me to remind you that the bruise on your ass is from when you danced on the table at Ziggy's, saw a cop and tried to 'fly away'.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
carb up bitch. we're drinking with football players.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Randomize
