Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
apparently when the FedEx truck drove by, we tried to chase it down thinking they were delievering a 30 pack...great night.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Is it rude if I ask the current tenets of our future apartment if I can come and blackout for a night? I want stupendously drunk me to get a feel for the place so he's comfortable when we move in.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
she just called me the flavor packet to her ramen noodles. get me the fuck out of here.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
The UTI came back with a vengeance.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Randomize
