I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Dude. No way. She insults the term butterface. She's a butternothing.
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
I got laxative. And a toothbrush. Because who wants to buy just laxative on a Friday night?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I accidentally gave my prayer card to the bouncer. Clearly a cry for help #saveme
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
Randomize
