So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
Just sold all of my pants in order to buy tonight's whiskey. Goodbye, high functioning alcoholism. Hello, Dad.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
She is feeding us popcorn out of her bra
dude he passed out in the strip club on his birthday, WHILE he was getting a lap dance. That drunk.
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
Mcnellies. I'm drunk enough that you have a window. Capitalize.
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
