oh great. kentucky is ranked #1 in the country for child abuse. go us.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
I rolled joints beforehand. Lit a candle. Ghetto rigged taping the 40's on my hands and then lit the joint using the flame of the candle.
I'm so proud of your modern ingenuity
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Ways to ruin a one night stand: the guy finds your parenting magazine on your dorm room desk.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
don't judge but I think I'm gonna go fuck a dad this weekend
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Randomize
