I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
It's like my work doesn't even care about margarita mondays.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Look I know it's late and I hope this doesn't wake you up but I feel like you should know that I'm sleeping on my couch in my own apartment so that my friend can get laid in my bed, and I would do the same for you.
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Oh my god. He likes it up the butt. But loves womanly support. Omg. Its bad. Its bad. Ive had too much whiskey for this to be ANYthing except bad.
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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