all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
We need a plan...
Find random men. Use them as sexual objects. There's our plan.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
so go get some goddamn bacon and lay in his bed naked. he'll love it.
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
