I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. Or a baby dinosaur. One of them ran over my body and then stuck me in a blender of fire and storm clouds
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
Pregnancy has ruined porn for me. I can't watch a hot chick get it on without being jealous of her perfectly waxed shit. I can't even see my shit.
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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