The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
he poured tabasco sauce in my vag.. I'm still having a hard time going to the bathroom.
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
I will be your sherpa up the mountain of gayness
Felt like shit, jerked off, felt ten times better. Being a guy rules. It's like I got all the demons out in 5 minutes.
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Well when we Get drunk it gets rowdy. We could always attempt self-control. But historically and statistically speaking, we fail at that.
"keg stand!" on a roof abruptly turned into "call the medics"
Randomize
