If they made snuggies with a sleeve for my morning wood, id consider buying one...
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
There's always the 'not have sex with the drunk girl I just met at some party' option.
That was the plan but Tequila showed up at the party too.
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
