Sry I called you an 8
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
Dude, the women on the view have some valid arguments
You know how I know you're gay?
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
90% sure I just opened a snapchat of you in a fuzzy bathrobe next to your ceiling collapsing
Banged a girl last night wearing nothing but my Team USA Olympic jersey. I think it's safe to say that nut was for America.
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