I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
Shoot me. Guy hitting on me with a beaver on his head. Says it is his spirit animal.
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Randomize
