first missing my period. then crying at the clinic... but why?
we had sex 3 months ago. you missed your period 2 weeks ago. but nice try.
I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
DONT EVER DUNK OREOS INTO WINE . NEVER
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
No it's ok I've been talking to the girl at the Chinese restaurant about your dick for the last 20 minutes. I haven't mentioned your name but she thinks she knows you.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
