oh god the rape fog is back!
I use a guy for sex and get three minutes out of him. go figure
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
A girl at the bar is wearing green body paint instead of a shirt. Where are you?!
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
It's meant to be, Cynthia. You, him, and your developed breasts are meant for each other.
Those nachos came to me in a dream
Randomize
