You are the one person I know will appreciate this- and I'm aware that its nearly 5 am- but I have 3 words... G spot orgasm. BE JEALOUS
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
they're mlb prospects.. of course i'm gonna bang one of them.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
I just set my messenger to Away so I could run downstairs to masturbate. Working from home is the BEST
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
