That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
She started crying. I don't think she's gotten head from a sax player before.
Uh, also, Rob told me he felt bad for choking you.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
why are there 3 differently sized panties on our kitchen counter?
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
Randomize
