Sex on a trampoline was so worth getting a mosquito bite on my penis
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Of course I will... FYI I just gave my balls a crew cut.
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
So I just noticed that my last drunk google search before going to bed last night was "ghosts based on gays." I have no idea what that's supposed to mean
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
sometimes i just have a bad day n consider lowering my standards
Randomize
