bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
fine. I googled it. you have to eat 5 to die so apparently I'm in the clear.
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
I got a second ticket last night for drunkly using my one call to order a pizza and get it delivered at the police station
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
