Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
You, me, naked, mistletoe, fifth of jack, gallon of lube, condoms, Cheetos, handcuffs, rope, along with no morals, inhibition or judgment. That's all I want for Christmas.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
I put miralax in my rum/coke. Go hard or go home.
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
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