I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
I threw your vagina at him like a grenade. And sweet Jesus he caught it like a champ
The night's not a success unless at least 60% of participants wake up with bite marks on their genitals the next morning.
I don't know what kind of parties you go to, but we should hang out more often.
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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