You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
You called me twice to tell me that you spit in your own eye, when I was right next to you.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Just come back with most of your limbs...and your dick. Please and thank you
Gross! What the hell is that?!?
It's quite clearly a man posing erotically with multiple packages of bacon.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
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