it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
My radar detector detects ice cream trucks. I think it was made for stoners
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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