He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just made ouyt with a dude on the real wporld...I said I dont want my face blired out
I just gift wrapped bread.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
Thanks for bailing me out last night guys. it's bullshit that everbeering people at bars is illegal. bitches have no sense of adventure anymore
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
I'm playing a lilo and stitch drinking game
Aloha alcoholism.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
Today I had sex and flossed at the same time. My relationship goals have been exceeded.
He said he would get me a helmet and bedazzle it with my name and address so the cabs would know where to take me
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
