Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
I just witnessed Grandma making her infamous daiquiris. Extraordinary.
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
We aren't doing Shrooms tonight bc that would be friendship cheating on you
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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