I want to stick my p in your. b.
So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
he was like Britney Spears in bed.. a little chubby and too medicated to perform.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
Randomize
