how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
Cops showed up at 4 am to address a noise complaint and she called them pussies for not doing shots with us.
Dude i'm seriously thinking about his nipples.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Am I not being subtle enough by giving him a rainbow striped bong, during PRIDE MONTH?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
Her text was so long it had an arrow to expand it. You know it's bad when even your iPhone can't handle her
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
The assignment was about the Industrial Revolution so I just screamed at them in a British accent all day. No, they didn't know I was hungover.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
She pooped on me during a reverse cowgirl. And it wasn't a little bit either.
Randomize