I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
There is something about listening to Patsy Cline while pooping that makes the experience so much better.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
So last night, I bought mother's day cards and the Plan B pill.
that's what I'm here for. I'm literally just bad advice mixed with motivational sentences.
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Randomize
