awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
She's holding my hand. I'm going to kill myself.
The man at the Honda dealership told me I smell like vodka and probably shouldn't be driving.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
You fell asleep leaning on my shoulder at the bar
He just walked up to be, grabbed my boob and said 'i think they have shrunk' i have no idea who he was.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
Just be happy that you're the pretty friend. Otherwise you would have had to walk home alone, like me.
I GOT JUDGED BY A GUY WORKING AT THE LEAST CLASSY STRIP CLUB. Peeing isn't a right, it's a privilege.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize
