Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
I'm drinking and working out! I'm bench pressing the beer pong table and doing push ups and lifting the chair.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
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