hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
A guy in a big stork costume just came to our meeting to give us condoms and t-shirts telling us not to get pregnant. Only at college
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
Randomize
