; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
whats a more ladylike way to say "fuck me on your lunch break"?
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Laying in bed nude eating a Big Mac with a cat. It's gonna be a good year.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
