You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
Pregnant only lasts nine months, being hot takes way longer to go away. So yes, I will continue to hit on the hot pregnant girl.
If I weren't her cousin I'd take advantage of her and this low point in her life.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
I recorded his orgasm, set it as his ringtone, and called him while they were singing happy birthday to his mom. Yeah, revenge is sweet.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I've decided to become a librarian so I can drunkenly quote The Mummy and have it be legit.
Cover your peen. We're going out.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
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