So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
Scary. I thought trees were a lie and that someone ha permanently stenciled them into my life. No joke.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
Up until today, I never would have thought I'd have to tell someone not to color on the cat
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
