u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
Next time she asks for a ride to her "cousins" house and it turns out to be a booty call we're charging her for each mile.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
The last thing I remember is him yelling from across the room "WE FINISHED THE HANDLE!"
It was 11pm.
I FOUND THE LEGS
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I’ve got a lot of questions but the first one has to be where you got the flame thrower.
Randomize
