No, drunk sperm still make babies.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Apparently I tried to convince him to sleep with me by showing him that I could do dips....
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
I have 3 bottles of vodka in my room telling me not to go to work tomorrow.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I had to cum in my sink.
Randomize
